the angel is full of forests
iamtonysexual:

horus-zahak:

biggggblack:

aaamaaazooon:

LET’S DO A REVIEW OF LISA FRANK© BRAND BERRY-SCENTED BODY WASH
WE GOT THIS SHIT AS A CHRISTMAS GIFT THANKS TO BERRY-SCENTED TUMBLR USER JENNYLOGGINS
I AM A HULKING, BURLY, MASCULINE MAN, SO USUALLY I USE OLD SPICE OR IRISH SPRING OR SOME MANLY SHIT LIKE THAT BUT TODAY I WAS OUT OF SOAP SO I USED THIS SHIT
FIRST OFF LET’S START WITH THE PACKAGING

THIS FUCKING RAINBOW-ASS UNICORN IS THERE IN THE SHOWER EVERY DAY, EVERY FUCKING DAY THIS LITTLE FAGGOT SITS THERE AND GIVES ME THAT SULTRY GAZE WHILE IM TRYING TO CLEAN MY VULNERABLE NAKED ASS


rub me on your body

ALSO IT’S WORTH NOTING THAT THIS SHIT COMES WITH A WARNING NOT ONLY TO KEEP IT OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN BUT THAT PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO YOUR SKIN CAN GIVE YOU RASHES AND PROBABLY UNICORN HERPES OR SOME OTHER SHIT

IDK ABOUT YALL BUT LAST I CHECKED THE EXACT PURPOSE OF BODY WASH IS PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO YOUR SKIN SO THAT RIGHT THERE WAS A RED FLAG BUT I PROCEEDED, ALBEIT WITH PROPER PRECAUTION AS TO AVOID APPLYING AROUND MY EYES AS DIRECTED BY THE PACKAGING OF LISA FRANK© BRAND BERRY-SCENTED BODY WASH. ALSO IT SAYS TO KEEP IT OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN WHICH LEADS ME TO BELIEVE THEY ARE MARKETING THIS PRODUCT NOT FOR CHILDREN BUT FOR GROWN MEN SUCH AS MYSELF
I APPLIED A GENEROUS AMOUNT TO MY HANDS TO BEGIN THE CLEANING.


i’m so fucked up

AND THAT WAS WHEN THE MOST POTENT SMELL OF ARTIFICIALLY FLAVORED BERRY I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED IN MY LIFE HIT ME LIKE A FUCKING EARTHQUAKE
I NEARLY FELL OVER IN THE SHOWER. IT WAS SO FUCKING BERRY. IT WAS LIKE I MADE SWEET LOVE TO AN ANTHROPOMORPHIC BERRY WOMAN AND DOVE NOSE-FIRST INTO HER GUSHING FRUITY LOINS. THERE WAS NO FURTHER DOUBT THAT THIS WAS INDEED LISA FRANK© BRAND BERRY-SCENTED BODY WASH. IT’S NO WONDER LISA FRANK’S ART IS ALL SO COLORFUL, SHE’S FUCKING HIGH AS BALLS HUFFING HER BERRY-ASS BODY WASH.
IT GOT ME CLEAN BUT I HAVE A HEADACHE FROM ALL THAT FUCKING BERRY. I UNDERSTAND THE WARNING LABEL NOW. THIS SHIT IS PROBABLY TOXIC TO SMALL CHILDREN, IT’LL BERRY THEIR FUCKING BRAIN CELLS TO DEATH. DO NOT TRUST THAT SULTRY UNICORN. YOU SEE THE MILKY WHITE COLOR IT’S PROBABLY HIS SPOOGE IN THAT BOTTLE IT’S NOT EVEN BODY WASH I JUST CLEANED MYSELF WITH BUBBLY BERRY UNICORN BATTER
0/10 WOULD NOT BERRY AGAIN

I FUCKING AM CHOKING AND PEEING AND DYING OF LAUGHTER I JUST FUCKING CAN’T RIGHT NOW. PLEASE REVIVE ME SWEET LORD.

This post is my life force

note to self: make an audio post of this

iamtonysexual:

horus-zahak:

biggggblack:

aaamaaazooon:

LET’S DO A REVIEW OF LISA FRANK© BRAND BERRY-SCENTED BODY WASH

WE GOT THIS SHIT AS A CHRISTMAS GIFT THANKS TO BERRY-SCENTED TUMBLR USER JENNYLOGGINS

I AM A HULKING, BURLY, MASCULINE MAN, SO USUALLY I USE OLD SPICE OR IRISH SPRING OR SOME MANLY SHIT LIKE THAT BUT TODAY I WAS OUT OF SOAP SO I USED THIS SHIT

FIRST OFF LET’S START WITH THE PACKAGING

image

THIS FUCKING RAINBOW-ASS UNICORN IS THERE IN THE SHOWER EVERY DAY, EVERY FUCKING DAY THIS LITTLE FAGGOT SITS THERE AND GIVES ME THAT SULTRY GAZE WHILE IM TRYING TO CLEAN MY VULNERABLE NAKED ASS

image

rub me on your body

ALSO IT’S WORTH NOTING THAT THIS SHIT COMES WITH A WARNING NOT ONLY TO KEEP IT OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN BUT THAT PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO YOUR SKIN CAN GIVE YOU RASHES AND PROBABLY UNICORN HERPES OR SOME OTHER SHIT

image

IDK ABOUT YALL BUT LAST I CHECKED THE EXACT PURPOSE OF BODY WASH IS PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO YOUR SKIN SO THAT RIGHT THERE WAS A RED FLAG BUT I PROCEEDED, ALBEIT WITH PROPER PRECAUTION AS TO AVOID APPLYING AROUND MY EYES AS DIRECTED BY THE PACKAGING OF LISA FRANK© BRAND BERRY-SCENTED BODY WASH. ALSO IT SAYS TO KEEP IT OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN WHICH LEADS ME TO BELIEVE THEY ARE MARKETING THIS PRODUCT NOT FOR CHILDREN BUT FOR GROWN MEN SUCH AS MYSELF

I APPLIED A GENEROUS AMOUNT TO MY HANDS TO BEGIN THE CLEANING.

image

i’m so fucked up

AND THAT WAS WHEN THE MOST POTENT SMELL OF ARTIFICIALLY FLAVORED BERRY I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED IN MY LIFE HIT ME LIKE A FUCKING EARTHQUAKE

I NEARLY FELL OVER IN THE SHOWER. IT WAS SO FUCKING BERRY. IT WAS LIKE I MADE SWEET LOVE TO AN ANTHROPOMORPHIC BERRY WOMAN AND DOVE NOSE-FIRST INTO HER GUSHING FRUITY LOINS. THERE WAS NO FURTHER DOUBT THAT THIS WAS INDEED LISA FRANK© BRAND BERRY-SCENTED BODY WASH. IT’S NO WONDER LISA FRANK’S ART IS ALL SO COLORFUL, SHE’S FUCKING HIGH AS BALLS HUFFING HER BERRY-ASS BODY WASH.

IT GOT ME CLEAN BUT I HAVE A HEADACHE FROM ALL THAT FUCKING BERRY. I UNDERSTAND THE WARNING LABEL NOW. THIS SHIT IS PROBABLY TOXIC TO SMALL CHILDREN, IT’LL BERRY THEIR FUCKING BRAIN CELLS TO DEATH. DO NOT TRUST THAT SULTRY UNICORN. YOU SEE THE MILKY WHITE COLOR IT’S PROBABLY HIS SPOOGE IN THAT BOTTLE IT’S NOT EVEN BODY WASH I JUST CLEANED MYSELF WITH BUBBLY BERRY UNICORN BATTER

0/10 WOULD NOT BERRY AGAIN

I FUCKING AM CHOKING AND PEEING AND DYING OF LAUGHTER I JUST FUCKING CAN’T RIGHT NOW. PLEASE REVIVE ME SWEET LORD.

This post is my life force

note to self: make an audio post of this


"So they always put a girl character in movies for someone to fall in love with?"

my 7 year old son (astutely calling attention to the lack of female leads in action and adventure films).

While watching Johnny Depp and Penelope Cruz flirt in POTC On Stranger Tides my son asked me “Why is there always romance in every movie?” He had asked the same question last week when we watched Kirsten Dunst and Toby Maguire have their memorable moment in the rain in Spiderman. He’s 7 and not a fan of kissing scenes. I try to explain that many people, especially adults, enjoy romance so it’s a popular thing in movies.

He responds with “So they always put a girl character in for someone to fall in love with?” And I am floored, because I realize the message Hollywood has sent my child is that you only need to include one female character - and it’s not so she can be the hero. If a 7 year old boy can recognize that women in action films are nothing but a plot device it is time for the film industry to admit they have a problem.

(via dederants)


■ 15-Year-Old African Kid Tells Madonna To Go ‘Have Sex’ with Herself

almightykushlord:

Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told , one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to  and f*** , the local media are reporting exclusively.

“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.

In further discussions with journalists from the media, the  stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”

“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.

The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.

“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.

THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE

strangeasanjles:

hannigraham:

Hey everyone! I’m sure you remember this lovely post suggesting fantastic movies of queer ladies. And I thought that I might be of help, and give you links to those movies with some lovely lesbian romance.
To see the summaries of the films, check the post that gave me the idea. They make good summaries, and make them funny too. :)


R O M - C O M S

Kyss Mig(Kiss Me)
The Four-Faced Liar, 
The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls in Love
Saving Face
Nina’s Heavenly Delights
Yes or No
I Can’t Think Straight
Desert Hearts

F U N N Y  S H I T

D.E.B.S.
But I’m a Cheerleader
Itty Bitty Titty Committee

A C T I O N / T H R I L L E R / M Y S T E R Y

The Hunger
Bound
Kill for Me
Chloe
Cracks
The Moth Diaries
Affinity

P E R I O D  D R A M A S

The Secret Diaries of Miss Anne Lister
Fingersmith part 1, Fingersmith part 2
Tipping the Velvet episode 1
The Night Watch
Viola di mare
Farewell, My Queen

H O T  A S  F U C K

Bloomington
A Perfect Ending
Elena Undone
When Night Is Falling
Room in Rome

D R A M A S

Circumstance
Loving Annabelle
Gia
Blue Is the Warmest Colour
Aimée & Jaguar

T E E N A G E R S ?

Lost and Delirious
Show Me Love
Water Lilies
My Summer of Love
Pariah

T R A N S  W O M E N ?

En Soap
Laurence Anyways

O T H E R S

Bye Bye Blondie
The Secrets
The World Unseen


YES.

strangeasanjles:

hannigraham:

Hey everyone! I’m sure you remember this lovely post suggesting fantastic movies of queer ladies. And I thought that I might be of help, and give you links to those movies with some lovely lesbian romance.

To see the summaries of the films, check the post that gave me the idea. They make good summaries, and make them funny too. :)

R O M - C O M S
F U N N Y  S H I T
A C T I O N / T H R I L L E R / M Y S T E R Y
P E R I O D  D R A M A S
H O T  A S  F U C K
D R A M A S
T E E N A G E R S ?
T R A N S  W O M E N ?
O T H E R S

YES.


ebrodiva:

possibly the best headline ive seen all month

ebrodiva:

possibly the best headline ive seen all month



tashabilities:

hylianears:

micdotcom:

Canadian music festival takes huge step against Native appropriation

Follow micdotcom 

From their announcement:

For various reasons, Bass Coast Festival is banning feathered war bonnets, or anything resembling them, onsite. Our security team will be enforcing this policy.

We understand why people are attracted to war bonnets. They have a magnificent aesthetic. But their spiritual, cultural and aesthetic significance cannot be separated.

Bass Coast Festival takes place on indigenous land and we respect the dignity of aboriginal people. We have consulted with aboriginal people in British Columbia on this issue and we feel our policy aligns with their views and wishes regarding the subject. Their opinion is what matters to us.

Niiiiiiice


+cool

lotrlockedwhovian:

systemofadowny:

Take no shit

If only this was a socially acceptable way to deal with assholes in the world today…


©